I sit at the church’s bench and stare at Jesus on the cross. I hate my life. How did it go from perfect, to hard and then complicated. My life’s complicated right now. I can’t begin to think what’s gonna be Gray’s reaction. And soon I’ll be calling Sinclair daddy.
Twenty whole years without my real parents and just like flash everything changed. A former mob boss and a present drug dealer turns out to be my father. Oh God I hate my life more again. Where am I even gonna start from?
My phone rings as I pull it out from my jeans. I look at the dialer and it’s not in my contacts. I keep my phone on the bench close to me and mute the call. I blink back my tears and wipe my eyes. My phone rings again and I’m getting irritated at the caller. I pick up my phone and angrily swipe the answer icon.
” Ariel..” A male voice speaks on the phone.
” Who’s this?”
” It’s Theo.”
” Sterling?” I ask. Why’s he calling me? I don’t even need the job anymore. I just wanna stay indoors and grieve.
” Yeah. I wanted a favor from you. Your boyfriend’s on my neck and he wants his money back.”
” Why not pay him?” I ask. He’s adding to my problems right now.
” I don’t have it. I told him this weekend and he’s not listening. I want you talk to him and maybe plead with him.”
” And why should I do that?”
” You know he listens to you. I’ve never ask you for something before and I need your help. This weekend I’m giving him his money back. I really can’t handle Gray.”
” No Theo.” I hang up and keep my phone.
I take a deep breath and look at Jesus hoping he’d give me a sign. A sign that everything’s gonna be fine. That I’m gonna be fine. That every single turns and events that happened to me , happened for a reason. I shut my eyes and say a silent prayer. I open my eyes only to see the person i never thought I’d see anytime soon.
” Ariel..” Freddie says as he looks at me.
He smiles softly and sits next to me.
” What are you doing here?” He asks and looks at me briefly before turning to look at Jesus on the cross.
” I should be asking you that too.” I tell him and he chuckles.
” Confession. It’s been long since my last confession.”
I chuckle.” Never knew you’d come to the priest for confession.” I say and he laughs softly.
” Right? I always do. The day I fucked up our friendship, I made a confession. That happened to be my last and now this one.” He sighs.
I nod without looking at him.
” So you, what are you doing here?” Now it’s his turn to ask.
” Meditating. I’m just sick.” I say half the truth. Right now I’m sick. Sick of all the drama and lies. It sucks.
” You’re sick? What happened to you?” Freddie asks. It’s nice to know that he cares. Even if our friendship is already ruined and we can’t go back to being close friends, he still cares for me.
I sigh and look at Freddie. He can see the vulnerability in my eyes. I feel like puking.
” Did Gray hurt you?” He asks all of a sudden.
” No, Jeez. It’s not Gray. I’m fine. I’ll be fine. I’m here because i need to listen to my thoughts for once.” I sigh.
Freddie nods and smiles at me.” You know despite everything that happened, you still stand up tall. You proved to the world that nothing can actually break you. You can handle every single pain and you’ll always be fine. You thought me that.” He says as we turn to look at ourselves.
” I might not really know what’s going on with you, but I’m pretty sure you’ll be fine and you’ll handle everything just fine. And if it’s relationship issues , it’s not worth it. The pains , the tears and the deep thoughts and thinking less of yourself. It’s not really worth it. No matter what, just remember that some people out there truly cares about you.” Freddie says and that made me smile.
” Thanks Freddie.”
He gives me a small smile.” Wanna have lunch? I mean it’s fine if you say no. I can still understand. You’ve gone through a lot.”
Lunch with Freddie?
I don’t wanna complicate things more with myself and Gray.
” Stop overthinking things , Ariel. I understand. Nice necklace by the way.” He says and tip his chin to my chest.
” You’re welcome. I should get going.” He stands up and shoves his hands inside his pants.
” Becareful princess. I still care about you and I still miss you.” He reminds me and turns to leave.
” Fred..” I call out to him as he stops. He looks at me and walks back.
” Why did you do it? Broke our friendship?” I ask him.
He takes in a sharp breath and looks at the floor.
” It’s funny.” He shrugs and looks away from me.
” I already forgave you. You can just tell me why.”
He sighs and walks back to the bench to sit next to me.
” When you graduated high school, I wanted to tell you how I feel since you’re out of highschool. I couldn’t, I thought maybe you were gonna hate me and we won’t be friends. Leslie liked me then since highschool I think. She told me she liked me and she wanted me to date her one night at my house. I told her no , even if it was weird she was at my place at a very wrong hour…” he stops and looks at the statue of Jesus before looking down at his legs.
” I told her I liked you, like loved you. She was mad and angry but I noticed she masked it perfectly well. She said she could help me get you to like me back since I don’t like her. She told me about your nun dreams. I was furious you didn’t tell me about going to the convent. She said you liked me also and she told me your mom was the reason behind your going to the convent. Leslie told me you don’t want to be a nun but your mom made sure you agree. She advised me to drug you. It was supposed to make you horny and maybe you’ll tell me how you feel about me. And that you’ll let me have you. I was wrong, it just drugged you and made you hate me more. It was a dick move , I’m really sorry.” He bites his lip and sighs. He’s still fighting the urge not to look at me.
I can’t believe Leslie would do that. She made Freddie drugged me and she didn’t even tell me about it till date. Leslie didn’t really apologize for even bullying me and saying shit about me. I still overlooked everything she did to me and treated her like a sister when her own mom pushed her out. Can’t believe she made Freddie raped me.
” I’m sorry. I was stupid and foolish. I confronted her about what happened and she said I deserved it. That I was stupid to think she would wanna help me.”
I wipe my eyes and stand up. I can’t take anymore of this. I just wanna get out of here. Maybe go to a club and get drunk to numb my pains. My life suck. I head for the church door as Freddie chased after me.
” Ariel, please I’m sorry. I regretted everything.”
I shouldn’t have asked if I knew I was gonna get hurt more. It’s like I got raped yesterday even if it’s months ago. I’m not really angry at Freddie as much as I’m angry at Leslie. She lied to me and took advantage of me. Who knew if she hasn’t really changed or she’s trying to use my vulnerability against me cause her mom kicked her out.
I stop beside my car and turn to look at Freddie.
” I’m not angry at you. Leslie actually. Can’t believe she’d do that. I just wanna go home. Becareful Freddie.” I open my car door and slide into the driver’s seat.
I ignite the engine and drive into the street. I drive straight to my apartment and halt the car. I step out of the car and walk into the lobby. I enter the elevator and press my penthouse button. I lean against the wall and stare at my reflection at the transparent elevator walls. I continuously wipe my tears and thank God Gray haven’t called yet. I really can’t handle him right now.
The elevator slides open as I step out. I punch in my code and the door opens. I walk in and shut the door. Alexa isn’t around I think cause everywhere seems quiet. I walk to my bedroom and undress myself. I stay under the shower for God knows when as I step out. I put on one of Gray’s hoodie that i successful took , and I wear a pink cotton shorts. I go to the living room and turn on the TV as a music station pops up.
Rihanna’s music video displays on the TV as she dances to her song. I go to the kitchen and brew coffee for me. I add cream and a little sugar and I sit on the island stool with my elbows on the counter. I run my hand through my hair and take in several deep breaths. My doorbell rings and i groan. Who’s here to visit I’m not in the mood for this.
I stand up and walk to the door as I look through the peephole. Sinclair? What’s he doing here? How did he find me? I sigh and twist the doorknob open as the door opens.
” What are you doing here? How did you find me?”
” Sorry, that must be creepy for you. I wanted to see you.”
” We just saw each other like almost a hour ago.”
He sighs and nods.
” Why are you here?” I ask him and cross my arms.
” Can I come in?” He asks instead of answering.
I step aside and let him come in. I shut the door once he’s inside and look up at him. He’s really tall. I think I took my mother’s height. Because even with heels, Gray’s still taller than me.
” I’m sorry. For everything. I know it’s hard for you to take in and I understand. I just wanna let you know that I’m sorry that this is happening. I want you back Ariel. I know this feels weird and new but I’d like to have you back…” he says.
” Please…” He plea when I didn’t answer.
Where am I supposed to start from?
” Erm… we can hangout all weekend to know each other better if that’s fine by you. It will be nice of you to consider my offer.” He says.
I sigh and cross my arms.
” What type of hangout?”
” Father-Daughter hangout. You can come spend the weekend with us…”
” Us?” I ask.
” The family.”
” You’re not introducing me to the mafia are you?”
” I won’t , if you don’t want me to.” He shrugs.
He’s kinda handsome for someone who’s into this type of shitty job. My moms looked really well. Can’t believe both sisters dated one man.
” We can also talk more if you want too. I just wanna hangout with you. I missed my daughter. Eighteen fuckin years.” He sighs.
I take a deep breath and nod.
” I’ll think about it.”
” Thanks. Can I call… you know..” Sinclair rambles.
” You don’t have to be nervous. Phone?” I open my palm for him as he gives me his phone.
I take it and type in my number. I press the call icon and it rings before i hang up. I give him back and he gives me a small smile.
” Thank you.
I smile back.” Sure.”
He stares at me awkwardly as he keep back his phone. I stand on my toes and wrap my arms around him. At first he tenses but later relax to the hug. I barely could believe I’m doing this. This feels awkward. He wraps his arms around me and pat my back.
” Thanks Scarlett.”
I don’t really like the name Scarlett but I didn’t tell him that. We pull apart and he flashes me a big smile.
” See ya around.” I tell him.
” Nice penthouse by the way.”
I chuckle and nod. I open the door for him and he walks out. Before I could shut the door , Alexa and Leslie walks in. The sight of Leslie made my stomach hurt and I hate the fact to think that she fucked up my friendship with Freddie.
” Hi Ariel.” Leslie says.
Is it too late to hate her?
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