TOXIC … (18+) … Part 81

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IF YOU MISSED PART 80 CLICK HERE

~ROXANNE~

“Okay if you said nothing happened between the two of you then I believe you but I won’t stay put of he tries to come to you again or try to take you to any stupid family dinners. I don’t know if you know this but you’re the only thing that makes sense in my life right now and I don’t want to ever lose you. I know you wouldn’t understand but I have been alone for so long Roxy. My life hasn’t even been making sense but that changed, you’re the only one I have and you’re the only sense in my life. I don’t know how I would feel if that was to be the other way and I lose you to my brother. My stepbrother. ”
He says, knocking the entire breath out of me and making me feel so guilty and so bad of myself.

I understand where he’s trying to come from but how do I tell him? That I have this stupid attraction towards his stepbrother that I myself can’t and don’t understand.
How do I tell you that I have lied to you and most of your suspicious are true?
How do I tell you that I had kissed your brother when I didn’t know what came over me and when I had realized what I had done… How do I tell you that I didn’t regret it?

“It’s okay Ryder. You won’t lose me, I promise. ”
The guilt is eating me up so badly that I feel like I’m gonna burst.
I feel like if we don’t stop talking about this right now then I wouldn’t know what to do anymore.

“Come here. ”
He stretches his arm across to me and I breathe out before walking across the room to get into his arms, his scent engulfs me as he hugs me to himself and I breathe out on him, laying my head gently against his chest and I feel safe I’m his arms as I think about myself and my jumbled emotions.

This all started out right. I’m sure of it that it had, I had met Nick and I had been surprised at the way he looked, the way he liked so calm. Like he could handle everything that came his way, the way he looked so powerful. Then I had seen Ryder. He intimidates me, there was something about him. Even though I knew I should scared of him with everything with his appearance. His tattoo. His language. Everything screams danger and I probably should have been scared of him but I surprise myself when I hadn’t.
I felt no fear, it felt safe. He felt safe. I felt safe with him and I did not know what it’s about.

I had known him and I had been attached to him, denying whatever it is that I was feeling towards Nick.
I always knew there was something but I hadn’t been ready to admit it then that night of the party. The night I had for drink.
I know that it necessarily doesn’t matter not isn’t it said that when someone gets drunk, they do everything they are so afraid of doing when they are sober so does that mean that I had wanted to get close to him? To Nick?

What do I feel for him. He is my boss and.. That’s all I know. All I’m ready to charity but what really do I feel for him?
I have been so attached to him.
I love Ryder but what do I feel for Nick?

………………

Those of us criticizing Roxanne. I want us to know that it’s possible to fall in love with two guys 🚶🚶 and we don’t even know if she loves both or any 😂😂

What do you think she feels for Nick?? 😶😶

CLICK HERE TO READ PART 82



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