The urge and pressure to
practice what i see in the video
increase with each passing
hour i couldn’t it resist
I couldn’t stand it
I was at home one certain day
when Amaka,a girl in our street
came to deliver a message to
my own mother but
around.My elder siblings were
not around too.The junior ones
were playing outside the
“Is there any message for
her?”i asked amaka who made
to leave,since whom she came
looking for was not around.
“Don’t worry i will come back
again for her”she said.The
urge started again because i
was actually watching the
videos before she came.I felt
like grabbing her,to practice
what i have been watching
with her.As she made to leave,i
held her hand.I knew she
I laughed”nothing”i said.
This continued happening to
Three years passed and i was
thirteen.It was at this stage
that my friends taught me how
to talk to a girl to have her as a
I followed every step they gave
me and got myself one.It was
with her that i started pratising
the things i do watch both on
the television and on the
I brought home pornographic
videos to watch each time i
was alone.Nobody ever
noticed.I learnt how to use the
internet.Each time i logged into
the internet,i visited site that
contained adult materials.
I became so addicted to
pornography.My brain was
filled with naked pictures.My
performances depreciated to
I knew i was in a serious trouble.I couldn’t
concentrate on anything else apart from
the p–n videos.
It happened that one day in the church,i
almost disgraced myself.I saw a girl who
was not properly covered.She looked like
one of those girls in the bad films i
watch.My mind started telling me to go
closer to her.I stood up and started going.I
was few steps away from her when my
senses came back to me.Then i realised i
was in the church.Everybody was seated
while i was standing.I saw pairs of eyes on
me.I bent down to look at the ground as if i
actually came to inspect something
there.Then i went back to my seat.
The urge to have sex increased in me.I
couldn’t stay a day without thinking about
I knew i brought this problem upon myself
and i didn’t know of how to stop.I was
deeply addicted and i never imagined if i
can ever break free from it.
One of my major problems came like a rude
shock to me the day i saw a woman
dragging her daughter to our
“You are useless.you are a disgrace.you
must show me who impregnated you
I Knew i was in serious trouble.It was my
handwork.And to worsen everything,my
mothers and siblings were around.My
father too who returned few days ago was
I felt like disappearing but it was too late
because i saw the girl pointing at me.
“He is the one”she said
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