Me: oya na, step forward come swear.
Naso all of them adjust further away from the podium, Ishi ended the strange song that he was singing and sat, looking scary. Me sef I adjust oh.
Ishi: clear his throat you!! pointing at one man with bald head
Ishi: yes, you step forward!!
He spoke with deadly voice, the man stepped forward sweating and shaken.
He pushed the staff into the man’s hand, the rest were very quiet watching what was happening.
The man received his staff.
Ishi: repeat after me, I…
Ishi: put your name.
Man: I Thomas Ishiaki with shaking voice
Ishi: if I don’t vote honourable talk and do after I don chop everything wey give me, make I die and my family no go ever see light.
The man started trembling sweats broke on his face, Ishi looked up at him and his voice rumbled like real heads of the gods.
I jumped with Ugochukwu too in freight, the man recited everything breathlessly, oh men. Fear na tool for politics I swear.
Me: welcome on board! go serve yourself.
Man: I no even need to swear, you get my vote. If you no win ehnn… My die, honourable talk and do.
I didn’t know were the sweats disappeared to, the man that was acting like a jelly-fish was now acting all gingered and ready to massacre with two foodflaxs in both hands, he received the 200k from me and greed crept slowly into the face of the others.
He jumped on the podium and hasten his feet towards the buffet, he started hovering all over loading foodflaxs and chewing as many chicken laps his greedy mouth could take. Ishi come dey do waiting game, I swear the thing come work. He acted like someone who doesn’t look desperate to get them over.
Ishi: ohuooo! incantation ummh.. eklemor eklemor, humm… who wan swear?
Voices: me oh! honourable talk and do na you go win.
All of them rushed at Ishi fearlessly to take the oath, while the man that have sworn was eating like he is taken his last supper.
Ugochukwu and I went to the back room to await for Ishi return, I was so happy. I felt fly, I be wan jump go touch the dorm of the building.
Immediately we entered inside the back room, Ugochukwu stared at me and studied me like am incarnate of a legend.
Ugochukwu: you know your real papa at all?
Me: wetin bring that talk na?
Ugochukwu: why you no fine like Obasanjo?
Me: chaii!! Thank God I ugly.
Ugochukwu: who give you this kind sense?
Me: I no know, my mind just tell me make I try this plan out if em go work. Before plan B.
Ugochukwu: thought awhile wetin be the Plan B?
Me: na another surprise.
The door opened and Ishi entered beaming with smile, carry the charms in his hands.
Me: head of the gods, na you dey reign oh!
Ishi: ummhh… eklemor…
Ugochukwu: will you keep quiet!!
Me: calm down na, Ishi the drama don end.
Still holding all the charms to himself.
Ishi: I wan keep all these charms.
Me: you know say no spirits dey inside there bah.
Ugochukwu: allow the guy na, all these kind thing na fortune to am.
I eyed Ugochukwu, the guy just dey act like mumu.
Me: ehnn.. Ishi, them don swear finish?
Ishi: yes oh, you no trust me again?
Me: why not I pull out five thousand and give it to him use this one as transport!
Ishi: honourable talk and do!! the man wey be the face of house of assembly.
Me: Ishi you don scatter my head, repeat the new sugar you add to my title.
Ishi: face of house of assembly!!
Me: I go give you two million naira if you tell me that thing again oh!!
Ishi: talk truth.
Me: thief!! no think am sha… Ehnn.. You no go carry all the charms go, people go suspect say na fake.
Ishi: thinking umh.. na true.
Me: when I come yard after I win, I go give you more money and carry all the charms give you.
Ishi: no problem, make I dey go house before night go cover.
Me: no problem, greet everybody oh! tell them say I dey come back.
He went out of the room and Ugochukwu glared me suspiciously, I be wan slap out all those mumu thoughts wey dey twerk for em head.
Ugochukwu: wetin you wan use all these charms do?
Me: nothing, I wan throw away am sef. but we need to keep till the election finish, for some reasons.
Ugochukwu: but em no go enter my car again, light and darkness nofit live the same house.
Me: I start to laugh who dey deceive you say you be light?
Ugochukwu: I dey go church.
Me: biko adjust my see road.
I got out of the room and Ugochukwu followed from behind, I met them smiling and grinning. Everywhere was scattered with particles of food.
Voices: honourable talk and do! man wey sabi!! man wey nodey carry last.
Me: make ona go house, we go see for field tomorrow, go and enjoy.
They started hailing me again and I went inside the back room with Ugochukwu, we later got inside his car and drove out of the compound while the two bodyguards came behind us.
We lodged into another guest house close to the school, the two bodyguards booked a room closed to ours.
I was so exhausted, I went into the shower and had my bath came out and jumped on the bed.
I was so super excited about tomorrow, I drifted to sleep and then I find myself in..
I WORE A BLACK ROBE WALKING BARE FOOTED BY A NARROW PATH TO A STREAM BEFORE ME, THERE WERE TREES AND LITTLE GRASSES COMMON TO BANK OF RIVER, TWO BIG TALL TREES STOOD BEFORE ME.
I WALKED PAST THEM AND STOOD BEFORE THE STREAM, I WANTED TO STEP INSIDE THE STREAM WHEN IT TURNED FIRE.
SUDDENLY MY PARENTS APPEARED ACROSS THE RIVER.
My dad: stupid boy!! shouting at me
Me: papa, why!?
My mom: you no get sense.
Me: how mama?
My dad: troubles! troubles!!
He started shouting.
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