Me: you are a good man, Doc.
Ugogoro was just smiling as we left the man office, the moment we stepped out of the smelling hospital building he held his stomach then bend and started laughing.
Me: why you dey laugh na?
Ugochukwu: the way you price the nan ehnn.. you fit price person to enter hell fire him go gree.
Me: I still dey wonder how this smelling hospital get prestige oohh!
We went inside the car and Shantel topic cropped into my mind again..
Me: you mean say you no do anything with Shantel?
Ugochukwu: but I tell you say make you leave the matter.
Me: I nofit, tell me wetin happen?
Ugochukwu: Shantel na virgin.
Me: bad guy.
I started hailing him but he wasn’t giving in to my teasing at all, he returned everything with zombie face.
Me: you no last?
Ugochukwu: who tell you say we do something?
Me: so, how you take know say she be virgin?
Ugochukwu: na she tell me, she tell me say any intimacy go make her loose her vision power.
Me: why? how?
Ugochukwu: Shantel get beads for her waist, na her granny give am. According to their culture, she no suppose do se-x with anybody before marriage or blablabla.. say na water something blablabla… she go loose her vision after marriage if we do se-x.
Me: wetin ona wan still use the vision do?
Ugochukwu: I nofit, after your election. I nofit do am now, I want make she dey give us backup when needed bro, and that witch Alicia.
Me: you don remind me, make we go look for where we go jack that girl go if we succeed to kidnap her.
Ugochukwu: na truth you talk, but how we wan do am?
Me: na to go meet agent na, so that them go show us house wey landlord wan rent for developing area.
Ugochukwu: I know one well known agent, make we dey go there.
We drove to the agent office from the outskirt of the city, after passing Choba bridge.
We got there and met a man in his forties, he was eating roasted plantain and fish on his desk.
Agent: oga, ona welcome.
Me: we wan rent house.
Agent: I get many landlords contact, which type of house ona dey look for?
Me: self contain wey dey inside forest, or swampy area.
He looked at us like we are joking, but seeing the straight face we returned his skeptical look with he swing to work and told us one perfect location is in Ahoada.
We asked him to lock his office and we all drove to Ahoada together.
We drove pass the junction and headed straight on the Omoku road, we took right according to man’s direction.
He asked us to stop by a nursery and primary school gate, we all stepped out of the car while he pulled out his phone and called someone.
Agent: yes… ehnn.. people wan rent am… them never tell me..okay.. We dey sonicity gate… them get money.
He ended the call and told us the landlord is coming. After some minutes a short man that looked like ball appeared with bald head.
Landlord: na ona wan rent the house.
Agent: na them.
We entered the car and drove straight till the tarred road ended and we entered potopoto community, we just parked the car and used our feet.
We hammer trekking till we walked pass the last house, I started seeing movements in tall palm trees.
Me: no be monkey be that?
Landlord: yes, them plenty for there.
Ugochukwu: fine niggars go plenty for that bush.
We had to walk pass a monkey bridge before we now got to the self-contain apartment, the last house in that area.
When we got to that compound, we started hearing sounds in the bushes.
Landlord: na the house be this.
Me: Ugo, this one no go well?
Ugochukwu: this one go well.
Agent: ona go rent am?
Me: yes, so how much?
Landlord: na yearly.
Me: we just need am one Month, any amount you mention.
Landlord: we nodey rent am Monthly.
Me: thirty thousand naira with drinking money fee.
Landlord: when you wan park in?
We went out of the place together talking, people hardly come to that area.
Nice place for us to take the girl to, we finalised the payment and drove the agent to his office.
After paying for his service, we left afterwards.
Ugochukwu phone rang and he frowned.
Ugochukwu: hello… I can’t…. see I fit settle you… please..
The call ended abruptly.
Me: who be that?
Me: call am your baby mama.
Ugochukwu: potopoto full your head.
My phone rang too, na wa oohh! for all these callings this evening.
I picked my phone while Ugochukwu started the call and we started moving, he had parked to answer the call from Alicia.
It was Profit.
Profit’s voice: hello love love? she sound happy
Me: wetin make you happy like this?
Profit’s voice: many things, where are you? come home right away lets celebrate.
Me: I nofit come today.
Profit’s voice: why?
Me: I can’t, wetin ona wan celebrate? how is Johannah?
Profit’s voice: your daughter is fine fine, I can’t tell you on the phone. When I see you tomorrow, I will tell you the surprise.
I tried my best to know what was making her acting over the moon but she refused to bulge, I kukuma rest na. She ended the call, we were on the road for an hour due to traffick and Ugochukwu finally dropped me at my yard and then drove back with the car.
Obi and Samuel were fighting seriously in the front of the yard, before I could stop them Johnson has already done that.
Johnson: Obi, why ona two dey fight?
Obi: Samuel dey call me O O O O O BI!
Johnson: then you fight am? you need be killed like a rat.
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