I stood sweating profusely, I come dey consider myself like someone who survived world war.
I no even send the ringing phone sef at all.
Me: Sandra wetin I do? Just one knot I nofit sleep in peace again.
Just then I heard a crawling sound, my mind skipped nobody tell me say make I run.
I dey door already dey inspect only to see one useless cockroach staring blankly at me.
My phone rang again, with the way that useless cockroach make my mind fly, na only miracle fit help am to live pass today.
Naso I pursue the cockroach round the room without giving it any breathing space, I take am like job to dey stomp on the marble floor anytime I don close in on am.
Na when the cockroach enter under bed thinking em dey safe, I raised the bed up in one motion stomped on it, I threw it out of the window lifeless.
My phone still rang again when I see say na that mumu Victory, I blacklisted her number.
Knowing very well that apartment isn’t good for only me to stay again, I jejely brush mouth and took my bath..
Dressed up and then dropped my Iphone because where I dey go avoid expensive phone, I came out of the apartment feeling hungry somehow sha..
I picked keke and left for St. John’s, from St John’s I reach Pepperoni come wait bus wey from Choba heading to Mile3.
I dropped at Ikeku and paid fifty naira to go to Azikwe street, for the back seat I sit down with two girls.
I come dey hear things I no suppose hear sef.
Girl1: sas him worwor.
Girl2: no be this guy wey him ask you out?
Girl1: na him na, very ugly useless boy.
Girl2: hope say him get money.
Girl1: sure na, I dey chop am clean mouth, I go soon tell am say I wan travel.
Girl1: him wan sleep with me with that him masquerade face.
The thing too much even the driver and the niggar wey dey front dey feel the heat, the bro at the front blocked his ears with earpiece while the driver raised the volume of the radio he and his soul alone is listening.
Na only me them leave to dey listen to the heavy gossip the girls dey serve hot for the back seat, the slim black one can talk chaii…
Girl2: see this fine boy say him like me.
Girl1: abegi! You and fine boy, that guy go chop you waka.
Me sef come dey feel guilty, see the way I dey feel like say those two girls dey use style style involve me for that their useless conversation.
Immediately we reach Azikwe street for back gate, I quickly come down settle the driver, I fit use leg waka abegii! Instead of two daughters of Eve to use me catch cruise, them fine clean sha..
I look left and right then start to dey waka looking faces, I dey avoid those niggars wey dey always ask for location then from there turn to billionaire with assets and then turn to person wey fit make you millionaire to drain the small penny wey dey your body.
The first time them do me that thing na my year one, I just return from cancelled lecture for hot afternoon dey reason how person go take get small income apart from allowee from my father.
Naso one guy ask me of one street I no know, I tell am say I no know but from there one niggar cornered me.
Tell me say that niggar na importer of gadgets and Uk used laptops, my eyes never open say internet and phones done change that 90’s stories wey I dey hear one guy help one rich man sell something then get divine help, my money and what happened became history sha..
I waka with suspicious look to anybody I see, because for that area everybody na potential thieves.
And the worse thing be say ASUU don send us to strike and UST don pull out of that association wey no wan make quality and reliable education grow for this country so that them no go retire.
I pass the most useless police station for the entire Port-Harcourt, believe the safety of police from that station at your own peril, them go rob you at broad daylight them no go even fit do anything.
Them fit dey point you gun people godey go about their business, nobody go send ona.
I waka pass the Catholic motherless baby home along that street, my brother friend dey work as gateman there but he is a graduate doing other works but that one for balance say!
When I got the street I wanted to visit my sister, the memories of that area started flooding in.
When Gov. Wike wan clear the ghetto wey dey for water side by force for that down, we no hear word for good four days. All types of gun sounds person pikin hear finish.
I got to her door and knock, she nodey house two men don tie towel for waist dey wait for their turn while one fine babe dey for front of their house dey press phone for where them never sweep for five days.
I pulled out my phone and dialed my big sister number, it rang and she picked.
Me: good morning, where you dey? I dey your house oh!
Mill: why you no call me? I don go work, I nodey house. Hungry dey catch you?
Me: yes, na.
Mill: carry key for …. you hold money there?
Me: yes, I wan hold.
Mill: go buy meat for Omor hand, soup dey when I come back I go balance you.
Me: how much?
Mill: three hundred naira own.
I look for the keys first when I don see am, I come dey reason to go buy the meat.
I waka come out of the gate stretched small, then I waka go buy the meat.
My phone just dey ring upadan as I dey waka dey go Mile 2 market.
The person go try calm down fess, when I reach there I saw Omor slicing the big flesh of meat doing calculation.
Omor: this pikin wey dey worry you don come again?
Me; iffa I no come who go come?
Omor: abegii.. You too get talk, how much meat?
Me: three hundred naira.
He did the slicing of the meats to sizes that he counted, I thank it and walk come see Scorpion dey waka upadan for Mile2 market.
The guy wey dey carry vigilante for head like say na by force to accept their security. If you no pay them go rob your room so that na you go advise yourself to pay.
As I enter my sister house street wetin I see shock me.
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