******* HASTY DECISION*******
It was so beautiful as I kept glancing my phone to read stories on facebook, and the more comments I got to ask my husband , the more panicked I got. I thought of how best to start without pissing him off and without being suspicious but I got none until an idea came to my mind while we were having our breakfast the next morning.
“Babe, are you okay . You seem a little quiet.” He said to me, I could see the look of concern all over his face.
I sighed and replied. “Nothing, love.”
“”Come on, we both know that’s a lie and you haven’t even eaten anything out of your food.” He stated. “My love, your happiness is my happiness, I live to make you happy, so tell me what the problem is.”
I gave another exasperated sighed and abandoned my food, leaning back against the seat.
‘Henry, something has been bothering me and I do not know how best to approach this.”
He stopped eating, giving me his full attention. “Talk to me.”
I sighed again for the third time. “A memory came to me, a name rather, part of that terrible night. I don’t know how best to approach this matter…”
“A memory…? A name? what name?”
‘First, please, that night, when they were talking to you, while I was unconscious, what were you discussing?”
He was a little bit taken aback and he stared at me for a while. Then he spread his arms. “I was just begging them not to hurt you, that was all.”
I studied his face and whatever emotions he was trying to hide was hidden so well so I decided to turn it up one notch.
“I heard the name …..Benita.”
I waited for his reaction but got none, then continued. “…so I thought you may enlighten me on who she is.”
“Who is she?” He asked.
“I don’t know, the guy mentioned it that night.”
He sighed and took my hand. “Baby, please let this go. There was no name that was mentioned that night, you were drugged, you cannot trust what you may think you heard.”
Okay..let’s play a game….
“So, what about the girl during your NYSC?”
At this he flinched but slightly. “I can’t believe you are trying to make a mountain out of a mole hill. How does my NYSC relate with what happened to us?”
“Do you know anyone by the name please?”
“Yea…yea…I know a couple of people, people who do not matter, for instance, the girl was my student during NYSC. Nothing more!”
“Baby, you do not need to raise your voice.” I tried to sound as calmly as I could but it was not helping. He was now standing up.
“What are you doing? Trying to accuse me for what happened to you? Do you think I have something to do with this. How delusional are you? How dare you think of something like that! I have been nothing but nice and understanding with you! Do you know what I’m going through!”
“I am sorry Henry, I just…”
“Being celibate for years, because of you! Do you think it has been easy for me and what did you repay me with, suspecting me for your r@pe. I cannot believe this! infact….” He left his seat and walked to the table, then he picked his car key and left me sitting, some seconds later, he was driving out of the compound.
God! What have I done?

It was already some minutes past 10 pm, my husband was yet to come home and his line was switched off still. I didn’t know what to do so I decided to call Felix.
He picked the call on the first ring.
“Hey babe.”
“Yes love. How are you? Have you asked him?”
“Yes and he walked out on me, he hasn’t come home since then and his line is switched off.”
Felix chuckled. “He is with me.”
I sighed as I heard that. “Is he okay?”
“Yes and he has not told me anything. He only said that you two had a misunderstanding.”
I was surprised. He didn’t tell Felix anything….
“You didn’t ask him what could be the cause?”
“No babe. I think he is really keen on making the whole incidence a secret. Do not wait up, he is not coming home but he is fine.”
“Okay, thank you. Goodnight.”
“Wait….what do you want to do?”
“Well, I will get some sleep tonight, then I will know what to do.”

“Okay dear, goodnight love.”
“Goodnight Felix..,”
“I love you….”
I inhaled deeply and said nothing before ending the call.
Lying down on my bed, I stretched my hand to the nearby stool and took my night book. Then I opened to the middle page and in it was the picture …the NYSC picture….I had kept it that day. I looked at everyone in the picture then I turned it to the back. Somewhere at the bottom was written… Muhammed Ali memorial college, Bebeji tarea, Tofa localgovernment Kano state…
I took my phone and dialed a number, then I put it to my left cheek.
“Hello, yea, good evening. It’s Tola…..yes, is my passport ready? Okay thank you. Have you come up with the best excuse for my husband? ……..okay perfect…I cannot wait, I will leave for Kano tomorrow. Thank you Kate.”
In case you are wondering, Kate is my therapist and she is helping me leave for Kano and not only that, she is coming up with a perfect excuse for my husband on why I had to leave to take a vacation in a far away place, alone of course. Once he knows it is for me to get healed s
xually, I am sure he would not worry too much.
I returned the book back to the stool and held the picture in my head….
“Kano….here I come….”


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